Ever wish you could make money off of people's seemingly burning desire to give themselves hearing damage? If you can either a) Hear Iron Maiden from 9 rows ahead of you on the Bus.
b) Feel the chassis of your car/truck/scooter rattling when someone pulls up in an Acura with the bass turned up louder than Armageddon. OR c) Picture someone boring a drill bit into their eardrum Then you know you have a target audience! What does this have to do with saving time and making money, you ask? Well, nothing to do with money, really. But time, yes. For you see, something happens when we age. Like it or not, the membrane of the inner ear becomes more rigid and the hair cells, less flexible. This leads to diminished hearing. This phenomena, combined with the natural desire of fame and fortune that can only be had through hearing damage, leads to an individual with very poor hearing. With this information armed and in hand, set off to your nearest retirement home and witness the startling practical application of this knowledge: Some old people cannot hear very well. But what, you ask. What does this all mean? Allow me to demonstrate in scenario form, everyone's favorite: Meanwhile, at the retirement house: Kelly: (with slightly elevated tone) "Hey, mom, did you hear that blue ink has now passed black ink in terms of popularity in men aged 22-25?" Mom: "What's that, dear?" This important, "What's that, dear?" forces Kelly to reevaluate what she has said, and deems it either
a) Too unimportant to bother repeating
b) Too pointless and irrelevant to bother repeating
c) A wake up call for how stupid Kelly really is This has an extremely important implication to real life: When someone says something, don't listen the first time. Then rudely reply, "What?" If they begin to repeat themselves, then you can pretty safely assume that what they are saying is mildly important or relevant. If not, you saved yourself the space in your brain to process what the person has said! You can thank me now, Your neurons will thank me later. |
